Paul Newman’s daughter, Clea, says that her father’s memoir, The Extraordinary Life of an Ordinary Man is just a snapshot in time. His daughter, Melissa, says it’s part confessional, part self-analysis. From 1986 to 1991, he worked with his friend and collaborator Stewart Stein. Stein interviewed Newman and others, asking them to be honest in their comments. Although the project was dropped, the book was put together just about in chronological order to allow Paul Newman to relate his own story. Melissa’s note says the overriding theme is “insecurity”. I found the book sad. It’s just sad that a man who brought so much joy to others through his work never felt comfortable with that work or his own place in the world.

Newman traces it back to his childhood in Shaker Heights, Ohio. Yes, he grew up in the wealthiest suburb of Cleveland, but, his mother, Tress, was an insecure immigrant, a divorcee who married Newman’s father, Arthur, despite his family’s wishes, and after she gave birth to Paul’s older brother. His parents fought, and his father died at fifty-six, a secret alcoholic. Although Tress lived a long life, there were years that Paul did not talk to his mother, blaming her for his lack of feeling and his insecurity. However, he admits his lack of height, and the fact that he was half Jewish in Shaker Heights didn’t provide additional security.

He recounts his drinking, his time in the Navy in World War II, and additional drinking when he attended Kenyon College in Ohio. Or, at least he acted in plays at Kenyon College, although he has little to say about classes or education. But, he dives deep into his first marriage to Jackie Witte, a young woman at the summer playhouse where he performed and worked after college. He admits neither of them were prepared for adulthood, for marriage and then the responsibilities of parenthood. On what seemed to be a whim, he enrolled in Yale School of Drama, uprooting his small family, moving to New Haven before he left for New York City, and eventually the Actors Studio.

Newman is honest about his attraction to Joanne Woodward, and his five year affair with her while still married to Jackie. By the time they divorced, they had three children. Newman and Woodward married as soon as they could after the divorce. But, before he delves into stories of his career, Newman talks about his first marriage, and its failure, and his feelings about his children, that he just didn’t know how to relate to them. One chapter deals with Scott and his death, without providing details.

While the rest of the book deals with his acting career, his passion for auto racing, his philanthropy, he doesn’t hide his drinking problems. That hangs over the entire book. Friends, both of Paul Newman’s wives, and other show business professionals comment throughout the book on different aspects of Newman’s life and career.

How do you review a memoir? A friend told me to comment on the honesty, the truth as known. How does the author handle that? Paul Newman isn’t around to address this book. His daughter says it’s just a snapshot. But, I find the cover so appropriate. I think Paul Newman hid his true self from most of the world, and felt as if he never revealed it even to his children. The Extraordinary Life of an Ordinary Man is just sad.

The Extraordinary Life of an Ordinary Man: A Memoir by Paul Newman. Knopf, 2022. ISBN 9780593534502 (hardcover), 320p.

FTC Full Disclosure – I bought a copy of the book.