I seldom talk about a movie here. First, in the last two years, I haven’t been to a movie. And, I just don’t give up two hours of my life to watch movies when I’m home, unless it’s my seasonal appointment with “The Muppets’ Christmas Carol”. But, I’m a sucker for a good coming-of-age story, and “The Tender Bar” was J. R. Moehringer’s memoir before it became a movie. I always meant to read it, and never got around to it. Here’s the summary of The Tender Bar, the book.
J.R. Moehringer grew up captivated by a voice. It was the voice of his father, a New York City disc jockey who vanished before J.R. spoke his first word. Sitting on the stoop, pressing an ear to the radio, J.R. would strain to hear in that plummy baritone the secrets of masculinity and identity. Though J.R.’s mother was his world, his rock, he craved something more, something faintly and hauntingly audible only in The Voice.
At eight years old, suddenly unable to find The Voice on the radio, J.R. turned in desperation to the bar on the corner, where he found a rousing chorus of new voices. The alphas along the bar—including J.R.’s Uncle Charlie, a Humphrey Bogart look-alike; Colt, a Yogi Bear sound-alike; and Joey D, a softhearted brawler—took J.R. to the beach, to ballgames, and ultimately into their circle. They taught J.R., tended him, and provided a kind of fathering-by-committee. Torn between the stirring example of his mother and the lurid romance of the bar, J.R. tried to forge a self somewhere in the center. But when it was time for J.R. to leave home, the bar became an increasingly seductive sanctuary, a place to return and regroup during his picaresque journeys. Time and again the bar offered shelter from failure, rejection, heartbreak—and eventually from reality.
In the grand tradition of landmark memoirs, The Tender Bar is suspenseful, wrenching, and achingly funny. A classic American story of self-invention and escape, of the fierce love between a single mother and an only son, it’s also a moving portrait of one boy’s struggle to become a man, and an unforgettable depiction of how men remain, at heart, lost boys.
Named a best book of the year by The New York Times, Esquire, The Los Angeles Times Book Review, Entertainment Weekly, USA Today, NPR’s “Fresh Air,” and New York Magazine
A New York Times, Los Angeles Times, Wall Street Journal, San Francisco Chronicle, USA Today, Booksense, and Library Journal Bestseller
I watched “The Tender Bar” last night. “Now a major Amazon film directed by George Clooney and starring Ben Affleck, Tye Sheridan, Lily Rabe, and Christopher Lloyd, a raucous, poignant, luminously written memoir about a boy striving to become a man, and his romance with a bar.” While the two young actors who played JR were excellent, Ben Affleck was outstanding as JR’s uncle and the manager of The Dickens Bar. Yes, named after Charles Dickens. And, Christopher Lloyd was gruff and had one moment when he just about stole the movie as JR’s grandfather.
The movie doesn’t need to say a word about the men in JR’s life who stepped up to fill the shoes of his absent father. Uncle Charlie, and the regulars at the bar, were just what a young boy needed, available for advice and a great deal of encouragement. And, the music! The music is perfect for the story.
If you’re a fan of coming-of-age books, you might want to watch the movie, or, maybe even try the book.
I plan to try the movie. Hope it’s as good as the book!
As you can see, Harvee, I didn’t read the book. Really liked the movie, though!
From the preview and your description, sounds like a winner.
Thanks
I thought it was, MM. I thought Ben Affleck was terrific as Uncle Charlie.
My dad had a part time job tending bar when I was a little girl. My mother did not approve of the afternoons when he would swoop me up and take me with him, but because Cambridge was a small town where everyone knew everyone, she allowed it with reservations. I remember my little self sitting on top of the pinball machine watching that little silver ball bounce around, lights flashing, and I was having the time of my life. The DD Bar was a “stag bar” (men only) and I loved it and the guys who frequented it. Because of all this, I read The Tender Bar when it first came out and now look forward to seeing the movie.
Oh, I hope you get to see the movie, Kaye. I’m sure you’ll relate to it! Way back when, my great-grandfather was a tailor and owned a bar. My grandmother was sent to the bar to bring home a pony of beer every day – at least that’s the story I was told. They were German, so of course it was no big deal for the family to have beer.
I plan on watching it on Prime Video. Maybe today.
It’s worth ignoring the housework, Kaye.
Kaye, I love your bar story! We’re going to watch it on Prime too.
My great grandfather was a tailor too! He had to provide for his six daughters, and in later years when we lived across the street from his and one of my aunts, my mother still would send us across the street to have him fix zippers and torn seams
The story in our family, Jeff, was that my great-grandmother was the best-dressed woman in town, thanks to her husband.
I watched this movie a couple of days ago. It was excellent! I loved how the men in the bar became friends and mentors to the boy without a father.
I thought it was excellent, too, Joan. Of course, my favorite parts really did revolve around the bar rather than JR’s college romance.
Thank you, Lesa. I am looking forward to the movie.
I hope you enjoy it, Carol!
I enjoyed watching the trailer. I wish I could see the movie. I don’t have Amazon Prime. I hope it comes out on video.
There’s always the book, Bonnie!
We watched it last night. I’d have to say that Jackie liked it more than I did. That is, I liked it without loving it. I thought Ben Affleck was terrific, however, his best role in years, and the ’70s music was perfect. I thought the guy who played J. R. when he was older grinned way too much, but otherwise, nice job. And I loved that Caddy!
You hit on the highlights for me, Jeff – Ben Affleck, the music, and the Caddy! Actually, I thought the young kid was a better JR.
I love love love this movie and now I’m reading the fab book that inspired it. Thank you so much for writing about it in such a wise and wonderful way. Of course you are wise and wonderful, we already knew that.
Oh, Paula. I had to “approve” your comment. How could I not approve one that called me “wise and wonderful”? (grin) I thought Ben Affleck was terrific in the movie!